I share weekly actionable advice for people who use paper-based planning systems looking to live a more productive and creative life.
Should We Trust Our Instincts?
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Hey Reader Some of my favourite tips are the ones that our community sends me 💜 Every so often, I'll get a message via email or Instagram when someone has come across something that either reminded them of me (normally Coke Zero memes) or something they think I'll benefit from. It's definitely one of the nicest parts about sharing your life online! Let's not talk about the not-so-nice-parts, we're trying to have a good day here 😛 But the tip I've got for you today is one that I think a lot of us can benefit from. Often our first instinct when tackling a difficult emotion isn't always what's actually the most helpful. When we're feeling behind, we try to work harder. When we're anxious, we try to control everything. When we're overwhelmed, we might avoid the thing that's stressing us out altogether. It's easy to react to how we're feeling without stopping to consider what we actually need in that moment. That's why when I received a message from Heather on Instagram today about this problem, I knew I needed to share it with you (thanks, Heather!) Let's have a look 👀 The idea - Translate your feelings into wants, needs and actionsHeather sent me short video where the creator talks about unpacking your feelings so you can respond to them in a more productive way. While there are definitely valid reasons behind our instinctive responses to big or difficult emotions, this doesn't mean that they are always the best course of action. Sometimes they even end up making things worse. Instead, the creator recommended pausing to consider:
I summarised this into the framework of feeling > want > need > action, but this could be so helpful for anytime we notice ourselves falling into familiar patterns in response to certain feelings. The examples the creator gave were what really sold it for me though. They were very relatable. Probably because the video was what they called the "recovering overachiever edition" 😝 Not that I think I'm in recovery...yet. If you wanted to check out the video, you can find that one over here, but the examples they gave were: If you're feeling behind, what you want to do is work harder, but what you need is perspective. The way to get that is by defining what is enough for today instead of acting like everything is urgent.
If you're feeling anxious, what you want to do is control everything, but what you need is clarity. The way to get that is by separating what you can act right now on from what you can't control.
If you're feeling burnt out, what you want to do is push through, but what you need is recover. The way to get that is by taking a step back and doing something that refuels you.
If you're feeling insecure, what you'll want to do is prove yourself, but what you need is self-trust. The way to get that is by writing down what you're actually followed through on so you have evidence that you can trust yourself.
I also really appreciate how they organised the framework into a simple table in their video, so here's my quickly mocked up version! Now I'm not suggesting we whip up a table every time we're facing a big or difficult feeling, but I do think that pausing to consider what is actually going to help us in the moment is powerful 😊 Let's take actionConsidering a feeling that comes up for you a lot, dig a little deeper to outline:
Figuring out the exact need can be tricky, especially if you're just starting with this, but I've always found talking it over with a support friend to be a helpful way to unpack our feels 👌 Pssst...The end-of-year content has started over on the Goobers Who Read YouTube channel! 🥳 The most recent video (linked below) goes through a simple (but pretty) reading journal setup for 2027 which could be yours! Jump over there to find our how to win, or just as a way to get some inspo for your reading journal 😊 Stay tuned for more videos to come, including additional journal setups, the 2027 Year of Goober challenge, and our free book club 👻 Until next time! - Jess |
JashiiCorrin
I share weekly actionable advice for people who use paper-based planning systems looking to live a more productive and creative life.
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